me: i like it
yeah we can discuss some later
Sent at 11:30 AM on Friday
Tommy: haha nah nah i'll give it til noon if u wanna get deep on me
where are we working it together in boston?
TWSS?
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Golfing foursome
From deadspin:
"[n]ot even a fancy facelift to the Grand Dame aimed at bringing her defenses up to date could prevent some very familiar suitors from having their way in the first round of the Crowne Plaza Invitational."
TWSS?
"[n]ot even a fancy facelift to the Grand Dame aimed at bringing her defenses up to date could prevent some very familiar suitors from having their way in the first round of the Crowne Plaza Invitational."
TWSS?
Thursday, May 28, 2009
All you can eat
Co-worker to co-worker when discussing the Wendy's menu:
CW1 "what does 3 dollars get me?"
CW2 "about a gallon of frostee."
TWSS
CW1 "what does 3 dollars get me?"
CW2 "about a gallon of frostee."
TWSS
Mile High Club
From UNITED AIRLINES EMAIL:
Opt to play.
Your legs will be the big winners.
Dear Mr. XXX,
Play the "5 Inch Difference" game for a chance to enjoy extra legroom for an entire year with United's Economy Plus® annual option.
TWSS
Opt to play.
Your legs will be the big winners.
Dear Mr. XXX,
Play the "5 Inch Difference" game for a chance to enjoy extra legroom for an entire year with United's Economy Plus® annual option.
TWSS
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
How's your throat?
Friend who tried to finish a bunch of food in his mouth and wash it down with a swig of beer--all of which clearly hurt his throat on the way down.
"Oh man... i just swallowed hard."
TWSS
"Oh man... i just swallowed hard."
TWSS
Over her head?
Pretty sure nobody will know what you are talking about, but while studying for the CFA I came across this little gem:
"If spot and forward quotes are in currency A per unit of currency B, then currency A should go on top and currency B should go on bottom"
Exchange Rate TWSS
"If spot and forward quotes are in currency A per unit of currency B, then currency A should go on top and currency B should go on bottom"
Exchange Rate TWSS
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Positions, Positions
An author was discussing two different photos to use on the back of her book. Choosing between two, one in which she was facing the camera, and one in which she was looking over her shoulder, back towards the camera. She very seriously looked up from the two and said to the entire meeting:
"I just really love it from behind."
TWSS
"I just really love it from behind."
TWSS
BaseBalls
Pitcher commenting on his throwing that night:
"It felt great even though it was 5 inches inside"
TWSS
"It felt great even though it was 5 inches inside"
TWSS
Easy does it
Two women discussing one's Memorial Day trip out to Long Island--and the excess of traffic.
"Oh, it was so great being out there. I forgot how nice it is this time of year."
"Did you hit a lot of traffic on your way out?"
"Actually, no. It was smooth and painless."
TWSS
"Oh, it was so great being out there. I forgot how nice it is this time of year."
"Did you hit a lot of traffic on your way out?"
"Actually, no. It was smooth and painless."
TWSS
EnGAGment
A girl in my office just got engaged and all of the other women are far too excited, talking about the wedding and ring nonstop. Then one drops this about the ring:
"I'm, like, staring at... it's so big!"
TWSS
"I'm, like, staring at... it's so big!"
TWSS
Sword vs. Pen
Talking to Gabe about writing with a felt tip pen:
"This thing sucks, the tip is dried out."
She NEVER says that!
"This thing sucks, the tip is dried out."
She NEVER says that!
Friday, May 22, 2009
Tough decision
Anonymous Professor: Once a student scheduled some office time with me on a Saturday. Weird, but not a big deal. She comes in, wearing a dress. I tell her to sit down. She shuts the door. Turns around, looks me dead in the eye, drops her dress to the floor and says, "Fuck me Dr. XXXX." As a respectable member of the faculty, I politely declined. But it was the hardest thing in the world.
TWSS
TWSS
Just add some special sauce
My mother discussing the eating habits of our dog, Colleen, on the phone with our vet:
I don't want Colleen to come to expect gravy in her food every single time, because I don't want her to decide some day that she is never going to eat if it's not there. If she has only eaten a small part of her meal for 2-3 meals in a row, I'll add savory sauce, and she'll eat it up right away.
TWSS
I don't want Colleen to come to expect gravy in her food every single time, because I don't want her to decide some day that she is never going to eat if it's not there. If she has only eaten a small part of her meal for 2-3 meals in a row, I'll add savory sauce, and she'll eat it up right away.
TWSS
Cream of Beer
Cream of Wheat, Brooklyn Weisse Beer review
"Due to the difficulty involved in bottling yeasty, unfiltered wheat beers, it’s taken Brooklyn Brewery seven years to get Brooklyner Weisse Beer anywhere but barroom taps. But it’s now in your local grocery, and the timing couldn’t be better for this suddenly sultry summer. Fresh and sharp, and nicely balanced between slightly sweet and tangy, with characteristic hints of clove, banana, and a little caramel, it goes down smoothly on its own."
TWSS
"Due to the difficulty involved in bottling yeasty, unfiltered wheat beers, it’s taken Brooklyn Brewery seven years to get Brooklyner Weisse Beer anywhere but barroom taps. But it’s now in your local grocery, and the timing couldn’t be better for this suddenly sultry summer. Fresh and sharp, and nicely balanced between slightly sweet and tangy, with characteristic hints of clove, banana, and a little caramel, it goes down smoothly on its own."
TWSS
Yummy toppings
My friend at UConn talking about pizza
Mary: I am not a fan of sausage...
She never says that.
Mary: I am not a fan of sausage...
She never says that.
Craftsman
Deep man's voice:
"Logic says you can't pound a nail when you can't swing a hammer.....so much for logic. The craftsman auto hammer. The hammer that goes where other hammers can't. Driving home nails with the touch of a button. Innovation, better value, Craftsman. Trust in your hands."
TWHS
"Logic says you can't pound a nail when you can't swing a hammer.....so much for logic. The craftsman auto hammer. The hammer that goes where other hammers can't. Driving home nails with the touch of a button. Innovation, better value, Craftsman. Trust in your hands."
TWHS
That's What HE Said
royal bank of scotland employee, referring to making loans for green retrofit programs etc:
"we don't do that much work in that market, but we dabble and, usually when we dabble, we tend to get in a helluva lot deeper"
TWHS
"we don't do that much work in that market, but we dabble and, usually when we dabble, we tend to get in a helluva lot deeper"
TWHS
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Deli counter
i'm at the grocery story and i'm getting some cold cuts from the deli. after the butcher weighs the meats, he tries to print the label with the price on it from the machine, and it won't print out. In deep frustration he looks up at me and says, "this fucking thing! everytime it spits it out and then sucks it right back in!"
TWSS
TWSS
Gone fishin
Chloe: so I got back from lunch and Trevor was like "whatd you have?" because im endlessly talking about how excited I am for lunch
and I was like "tuna on a wrap"
"oh, mediocre"
"no no no, you haven't tasted my tuna fish"
TWSS
and I was like "tuna on a wrap"
"oh, mediocre"
"no no no, you haven't tasted my tuna fish"
TWSS
Quickie
Gabers: yeah, kelly and matt
but more importantly how is the job hunt going?
have you interviewed anywhere else?
me: na, trying to get past CFA
oh they're making it to the brook?
Gabers: yeah for saturday
then they have steffis graduation
me: ah, maybe ill come up on saturday
Gabers: i mean friday
me: oh theyre going friday?
Gabers: matt always does quick one nighters
me: twss
but more importantly how is the job hunt going?
have you interviewed anywhere else?
me: na, trying to get past CFA
oh they're making it to the brook?
Gabers: yeah for saturday
then they have steffis graduation
me: ah, maybe ill come up on saturday
Gabers: i mean friday
me: oh theyre going friday?
Gabers: matt always does quick one nighters
me: twss
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Packing
Sitting at home while roommate is packing for vacation to Colombia...
Laura: Try to think of something I may have forgotten.
Ryan: A book? Passport? Ipod?
Laura: Got them.
Ryan: Oh - ziplock bags? Are you checking a bag?
Laura: My liquids are too big to go through, even with a ziplock.
TWSS
Laura: Try to think of something I may have forgotten.
Ryan: A book? Passport? Ipod?
Laura: Got them.
Ryan: Oh - ziplock bags? Are you checking a bag?
Laura: My liquids are too big to go through, even with a ziplock.
TWSS
TMI
Female coworker #1 [rubbing her neck]: Night!
Female coworker #2 approaching: Night! Hey, you sore?
Female coworker #1: Ugh, so tight.
TWSS
Female coworker #2 approaching: Night! Hey, you sore?
Female coworker #1: Ugh, so tight.
TWSS
Like a Champ
Competitive eating gets... awesome? From the Seattle Times:
I jam my spoon into the half-gallon tub, shoveling a ridiculously large amount of creamy vanilla ice cream into my mouth. No time to chew, I think, as it drips down my chin. No time. Just swallow.
TWSS
I jam my spoon into the half-gallon tub, shoveling a ridiculously large amount of creamy vanilla ice cream into my mouth. No time to chew, I think, as it drips down my chin. No time. Just swallow.
TWSS
Are those headphones in your pocket, or...?
Even PC World is in on the action:
Bullet #5:• Keep the device in your pocket as much as possible, as rubbing it "on certain materials" too much can cause a charge to build up.
TWSS
Bullet #5:• Keep the device in your pocket as much as possible, as rubbing it "on certain materials" too much can cause a charge to build up.
TWSS
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Sometimes she wants more
Apparently this one night of Shakespeare in the Park got pretty wild. But, just not wild enough.
Eustis warned that the fun might stop at any moment, either if it started raining again or at 1 a.m. It rained again, but Eustis and the crazy Public kids were too busy dancing in puddles to pull the plug. We thought it was the best opening party we'd ever been to, but Eustis disagreed. “Could have been wetter."
TWSS
Eustis warned that the fun might stop at any moment, either if it started raining again or at 1 a.m. It rained again, but Eustis and the crazy Public kids were too busy dancing in puddles to pull the plug. We thought it was the best opening party we'd ever been to, but Eustis disagreed. “Could have been wetter."
TWSS
Grillin with a Milf
We were grilling at ****'s and his dad came down and said, "Do you think I can trouble you guys for an Italian sausage for my wife, she hasn't had one in a while"
and he's Italian.
TWSS
and he's Italian.
TWSS
Preparation is key
"The show starts at 7, you guys are definitely welcome to join. Just let me know when you're going to come."
TWSS
TWSS
TWSS vs Things She'd Never Do
Oh, NYT... this article was clearly written for TWSS
The Komodo dragon is already a terrifying beast (TWSS). Measuring up to 10 feet long, it is the world’s largest lizard (Doubly TWSS!). It delivers a devastating bite with its long, serrated teeth(She'd Never Do That!)...
Sometimes the victim immediately falls, and the lizards can finish it off (TWSS!)...
As mucus drooled out of [its] mouth, he used a test tube on a pole to collect it (TWSS!).
The Komodo dragon is already a terrifying beast (TWSS). Measuring up to 10 feet long, it is the world’s largest lizard (Doubly TWSS!). It delivers a devastating bite with its long, serrated teeth(She'd Never Do That!)...
Sometimes the victim immediately falls, and the lizards can finish it off (TWSS!)...
As mucus drooled out of [its] mouth, he used a test tube on a pole to collect it (TWSS!).
Surprisingly delicious
Even Travel & Leisure is getting in on things!
Check out this review of A Fuego Negro Restaurant in San Sebastián, Spain
The dramatic stark-black design is a refreshing departure from the woody cubbyhole look of traditional pintxo bars (TWSS)...The trio of twentysomething owners, veterans of some of the best kitchens in town, are heavily into global hip-hop culture; "Black Fire" is the bar’s name translated.(Black fire indeed!)...“The very first thing I put in my mouth exploded. There was a series of explosions, in fact, disorienting and strangely delicious, taking place as I swallowed a melon ball filled with sheep’s-milk cheese and…Pop Rocks? ...”
TWSS!!
Check out this review of A Fuego Negro Restaurant in San Sebastián, Spain
The dramatic stark-black design is a refreshing departure from the woody cubbyhole look of traditional pintxo bars (TWSS)...The trio of twentysomething owners, veterans of some of the best kitchens in town, are heavily into global hip-hop culture; "Black Fire" is the bar’s name translated.(Black fire indeed!)...“The very first thing I put in my mouth exploded. There was a series of explosions, in fact, disorienting and strangely delicious, taking place as I swallowed a melon ball filled with sheep’s-milk cheese and…Pop Rocks? ...”
TWSS!!
Even in this economy...
From The New York Times
Many American critics of the plan unveiled Tuesday by Treasury Secretary Timothy F. Geithner said the plan lacked details. Experts on Japan found it timid — especially given the size of the banking crisis the administration faces.
“I think they know how big it is, but they don’t want to say how big it is. It’s so big they can’t acknowledge it.”
TWSS
Many American critics of the plan unveiled Tuesday by Treasury Secretary Timothy F. Geithner said the plan lacked details. Experts on Japan found it timid — especially given the size of the banking crisis the administration faces.
“I think they know how big it is, but they don’t want to say how big it is. It’s so big they can’t acknowledge it.”
TWSS
Monday, May 18, 2009
Keep it clean
"I'm shaved too."
male coworker commenting on other male coworkers recently clean shaven face.
TWSS
male coworker commenting on other male coworkers recently clean shaven face.
TWSS
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Horseback style
So when we were in Chile, we went horseback riding and one of the women in the group didn't like the horse she had been assigned. I was next to her. I asked her what the problem was. "He wants me to do things that i dont want to do."
TWSS
TWSS
CELEBRITY TWSS:
Alex Trebek [at Tom Hanks]: We can't keep playing if you don't let go of the pickle.
Sean Connery: That's what your mother said last night.
Watch it here
Alex Trebek [at Tom Hanks]: We can't keep playing if you don't let go of the pickle.
Sean Connery: That's what your mother said last night.
Watch it here
Saturday, May 16, 2009
to the last drop
"I always finish, even if it's warm." Before a waitress took away the last of her beer--TWSS
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